Hercules,Lillith,Jason,and Iolaus II are all sitting in front of the Academy.Suddenly, Aphrodite appears.She runs to Iolaus II and cups his face,looking stricken.
Aphrodite:My poor,poor,Curly!How could this have happened?
Hercules:Aphrodite?Are you all right?
Aphrodite:Don't patronize my,big-brother.I heard what Deyhawk did.I...I'm sorry that I didn't fix it sooner;but I was a prisoner of war up there.I didn't know.
Hercules:How could you fix it?
Aphrodite:Special permission granted from Daddy.I can do a merging of souls,making our Iolaus be here,without being unfair to him.
Iolaus II:Really?You can do that?
Aphrodite:Yeah,but it's a one-shot deal...(as if something just dawned on her)Oh!Would you mind---
Iolaus II:Mind?That's a great idea!I can become what I always wanted to be;and loose bad past memories in the process!
Aphrodite:(cheerfully)That's the spirit!Anyhoo,this will take a lot out of me.I'll be powerless for three days.
Iolaus II:Are you ready?
The rest look on in shock.
Lillith:Are you sure this is safe?
Aphrodite:(offandedly)Uh-huh.(looks over towards Iolaus II and blows him a kiss)
From that kiss comes a golden-dust,which encircles him,turns to an electric-blue tornado,and then he is knocked down from the impact.During this time,Aphrodite is sliding down, seeming to get weaker by the second.Hercules catches her.
Hercules:(concerned)Are you both okay?
Aphrodite:(weakly)Y-yeah.I'll be fine.
Iolaus:(in his normal clothes)Hey,guys!I'm back!
A few hours later,Iolaus is walking with Hercules and Jason near the well.
Jason;I cant' believe this!It's really you!
Hercules:Yeah,I thought I'd never see you again.
Iolaus:Yeah,me,too.I really missed you guys.
Suddenly,a scream comes from the barn.All three of them rush toward the sound.When they come in,they see three cadets trying to hold down a struggling Aphrodite.Hercules grabs the main one by the hair and throws him through the roof.A huge fight ensues.After the fight, Hercules,Jason,and Iolaus are standing,trembling with fury,looking at the three guys unconscious in the hay.This dissapates when they hear a small cry from Aphrodite.
Hercules:(rushing to her side)Hey,are you okay?
Aphrodite:Um,yeah.(draws in a shuddering breath)
Iolaus:Did they---
Aphrodite:Huh?Oh,nah.I'm okay.
They all go back towards the academy.
Jason:I'll get some of the cadets to get them.
Hercules:Iolaus and I have been talking,and it's time we were on our way.(quickly adding) Are you ready to go?
Aphrodite:Well,sure.I mean,who else'lll take care of me?I mean,I'm a little helpless at the moment.
Iolaus:Um,I hate to bring it up...but you should probably get a different dress for travelling.
Aphrodite:(twirls)You don't like it?
Iolaus:(noticing how her outfit complements her)Um,yes,but...so will other men on the way.
Hercules:He's got a point.We could end up fighting every guy from here to Thebes.
Iolaus:We're going to Thebes?
Hercules:I don't know.I just thought we'd go wherever.
Aphrodite:(considering)Well,I do like shopping.
Hercules:Maybe Lillith has something.
Aphrodite:Hmmm.Well...leather.I do look hot in leather!
Flash to when they are on the road.Aphrodite is wearing a dress like Lillith's(minus the pants,of course).
Hercules:Well,here's a lake.Looks like a good place to camp for a couple of days.
Aphrodite:Um,can we get some---Ooh!Berries!
Iolaus and Hercules look up in alarm.They run toward her,just in time to knock a bunch of poisonious berries from her hands,about to be eaten!
Aphrodite:(shocked)What?
Iolaus:Those are poison!They could've killed you!
Aphrodite:Oh,thanks.Um,is there anything edible around here?I'm starved,man!
Hercules:Okay.I'll go get us something.Iolaus will keep an eye on you.
As Hercules walks off,there is a scuffling in the bushes.He turns back,and Autolycus & Salmoneus come up.
Iolaus:Where'd you guys come from?
Autolycus:Never mind that...Who's this voluptuous vixen?
Salmoneus:A-aphrodite.
Aphrodite:(grins in slight amusement)Hey.
Autolycus:Aphrodite?The goddess of love?
Aphrodite:The one and only.(twirls)
Salmoneus:Um,do remember when last we met---
Aphrodite:Sorry,honey.I think I'm in love.
Hercules:(answering Salmoneus' questioning glance)Hef---
Aphrodite:(laughs)Herc!Are you nuts?
Hercules:Huh?
Aphrodite:We gave it a shot---twice if you count the conception of Cupid---but,it could never be more than a fling.I can't be with him again;ever!He's too rough,and he scares me.We ended it months ago!Besides,now that Curly's immortal---
All:WHAT?!
Aphrodite:Oops!Did I forget to mention?Well,when I cast my spell,that was part of it.Now,the three of us can be together forever.
Hercules:(smiles softly at his sister)Thanks.
Iolaus:(warily)You really broke up months ago?
Aphrodite:(gives him a quick but passionate kiss)Of course!I'd never put you in danger.Besides,you are the best kisser I've ever known.And,trust me,that's sayin' one heck of alot!
Iolaus:Oh,well...
Hercules:(clears his throat)Uh,weren't you hungry?
Aphrodite:Oh,totally.
Hercules:(glances sideways at Iolaus)You still want me to---
Iolaus:Sure.Go ahead,Herc.
Hercules nods and sets off once more into the forrest.
Salmoneus:So,what's it like to be with a goddess?
Iolaus:(annoyed)I don't know!
Aphrodite:(winks at him)Yet.Besides,I'm technically a mortal for another 42 hours.
Salmoneus:Huh?
Aphrodite:For this spell ot work,I had to give up my powers for three days,okay?
Autolycus:Why would---
Aphrodite:I told you,okay?Besides,what are you guys even doing here?
Autolycus:(smoothes his mustache)Um,well...
Salmoneus:(accusingly)It was his fault!
Autolycus:My fault?!
Iolaus:Let's see...you're on the run from some botched robbery?
Autolycus:(indignantly)Botched?Why,I'll have you know I'm the king of theives!
Salmoneus:Humph!King of idiots is more like it!
Autolycus:Who you callin' idiot,fatso?!
Salmoneus:(indignant squeak)Fatso!
Autolycus:You heard me!
Iolaus:(taking Aphrodite aside)You,uh,wanna go for a walk?
Aphrodite:(getting a twinkle in her eye)Can we leave Heckle and Jeckle behind?
Iolaus:Well,that would be my first choice.
They go off into the woods and end up in a beautiful grove.
Aphrodite:(slides down)Ummmm.(stretches)This is sooo soft!Wanna join me?
As he takes her outstretched hand,something magical happens.It is as though,in that moment,their souls forever become one.Iolaus slides down to her,capturing her mouth in sweet surrender.Flash to later,when they are lying on the ground.Iolaus is on his back, Aphrodite's head on his chest,her hand gently over his heart.
Aphrodite:(gently)Hey.
Iolaus:Hey,
Aphrodite:Um,do you still sing?
Iolaus:Sing?
Aphrodite:(snuggles closer)Would you sing to me?
Iolaus:(gets a soft look)Sure.(brushes his hand gently over her eyes to close them)Rest.[he sings the "Little Texas" song,"Southern Grace".] First time I felt the magic of her kiss,was under a Carolina moon.Sweet southern style;tender but a little wild.For me no other love will ever do.Her voice is like the whisper,of a warm wind through the pines.Her smile can reach the soul of any man.Her heart is strong,her love is true,and her touch is soft as lace.There ain't nothin' like a woman...with southern grace. You should see the way she walks into a room.It's almost like her feet don't touch the floor. But,when the chips are down,her feet are firmly on the ground.I could never ask for any more. Her voice is like the whisper,of a warm wind through the pines.Her smile can reach the soul of any man.Her heart is strong,her love is true,and her touch is soft as lace.There ain't nothin' like a woman...with southern grace.She's got me fallin' in her eyes,again tonight.Lost in lovin' arms,as the world goes by...Her voice is like the whisper,of a warm wind through the pines, her smile can reach the soul of any man.Her heart is strong,her love is true,and her touch is soft as lace.There ain't nothin' like a woman...there ain't nothin' like a woman.No,there ain't nothin' like my woman...Southern Grace.
Flash back to the campsite where they are still arguing.Hercules comes up with dinner and pulls them apart.
Hercules:Knock it off!(looks around)Where are Iolaus and Aphrodite?
Autolycus:(takes on a leering grin)They went for a walk...alone.
Hercules:(quirks an eyebrow)Oh?
Flash to an hour later,when dinner is on the fire,and they are coming back.It is now dusk. Iolaus has his arm around her,and her head is on his shoulder.
Hercules:Where've you two been?(plucks some grass from Aphrodite's hair)
Iolaus:(flustered)Um,well,ya see,Herc---
Hercules:(trying hard not to laugh)Never mind.I don't wanna know.Just come and eat.
They sit down by the fire and begin to eat.The next morning,they are on the road again and approached by Amazons.
Kendra:(purring)Ahh...men!They will make excellent slaves!
Nablin:But,what about the woman?
Kendra:She could come in handy with bring about their submission!
The Amazons laugh raucously,while all Hercules and Iolaus stand protectively in front of Aphrodite.Before any of them know what's happening,more Amazons drop from the sky, knocking them unconscious.When they awake,it's a few hours later,and they are all in cages.
Aphrodite:(shreiking)Let us out of here you...you...cows!You are going to be sooo sorry tomorrow!
Kendra:I doubt that.Now,as queen,I get first pick of the new males.Hmmm...let me see...I'll take...(points at Iolaus)that one!
Aphrodite:Sorry,Creepella.That one is spoken for...and I don't share!
Kendra:(cryptically)We'll see.We'll see.(walks towards the meeting hut with the other Amazons)
Hercules:(after making sure they were out of earshot)We gotta think of a plan;I can't break these bonds.
Autolycus:I've got it!
Iolaus:(dryly)Yes,but we're better off without it!
Autolycus:Why,I oughta---
Aphrodite:This isn't helping!We need to get out of here!I'm loosing feeling in my arms!
Hercules:(concerned)Aphrodite,your powers don't come back until tomorrow.Try not to make them mad at you until then.I mean,what if we can't protect you?
Aphrodite:Okay,big-brother.I'll be careful.But,Creepella better watch herself.
Flash to later that afternoon.Aphrodite is taken out of her cage,to the extreme concern of the others.
Kendra:You say that he is unquestionably yours?
Aphrodite:You got it; so keep your paws off!
Kendra:You have one choice; meet me in battle,or give up your love.
Aphrodite:(swallows hard)Um...okay.You just gotta give me a good rest first.We'll do this thing in the morning.
Kendra:(in agreement)Dawn.
Aphrodite:D-dawn?Can't you do it around nine?
Kendra:(firmly)Daybreak,or not at all.Well?
Aphrodite:We need better quarters,less bondage,and some food.Wine would be good,too.
Kendra:All right.Put them in the holding cell.
Flash to later that night.They are all sitting in that small building,trying to figure a way out of this mess.
Salmoneus:You know,Iolaus has been with women before...Amazons included.
Aphrodite:That was different.It wasn't forced.And he wasn't with me.
Iolaus:I know,but...you can't fight Kendra!Not until you get your powers back---
Aphrodite:Do you remember when I decided to be a war god for a while?When you guys taught me how to fight?
Iolaus:Will that be enough?
Aphrodite:We'll see in the morning,won't we?Besides,you guys can think of something by then,right?I mean,you always do.
Flash to morning.They are ready for battle.They start out with staffs on a bridge over a pit. Suddenly,Ares shows up.
Ares:(thunderously)What in Tarterous is going on here?
Iolaus:Bet you never thought you'd be glad to see him,huh?
Hercules:There definitely is a first time for everything.
Ares:Why are you fighting?Why not just use your powers?
Kendra:(confused)Powers?
Aphrodite:Because I don't have them back for another three hours!
Ares:Who took them?Zeus?
Aphrodite:No;it was a spell I cast.Um,can you just get us out of here?Please?
Ares:Us?
Aphrodite:Me,Herc,Curly,Autolycus,and Salmoneus.
Ares:Why?
Aphrodite:If you don't,I won't tell you what happened to Iolaus.
Ares:He's dead.
Aphrodite:Not anymore.
Suddenly,they are popped out of there.
Ares:I only did this because I was curious,mind you.I have not care for the well being or anything like that.
Aphrodite explains the entire situation to him.
Ares:Well,Sis,you always did have the oddest tastes.I'd stay for some "fun",but,I've got a war to keep up.
Aphrodite:Thanks Ares.
Hercules and Iolaus noted another first for them;Ares actually coming to the rescue!But,with Aphrodite and Iolaus dating,there were sure to be several more surprises in store.
*The End*
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